End of the Month

February 28 -- end of the 2nd month of 2013... All endings are new beginnings.  I'm always ready for new moments, new days.. new beginnings.  This isn't going to be one of those long philosophical posts.. just a note to welcome the month of March.  March - "in like a lion, out like a lamb"...  Well the lion arrived a few days early and will perhaps a couple of more weeks we will see what it brings.

I'm looking forward to playing some golf and enjoying my Colorado family...

Wahoo!!!!!

Thoughts

• It has taken awhile, but I've drawn the conclusion that I'm really not a Twitterer
• But, there are Tweeters I like to follow
• Geese all face the same direction when the wind is blowing, doesn't make any difference if they are on ice, land, or water - no matter how big the flock!  Check it out some time.
• It is worth getting up late on a clear night just to look at the stars
• it is worth getting up early in the morning just to check out the sunrise
• Ice is slick - even when you can't see it
• Birds are interesting creatures
• Love, live, laugh (I know it is not an original thought)
• Carolyn is a treasure that I truly treasure
• Mom is mom some days and I'm not sure on other days
• Sometimes we disagree so that we can come to mutual agreements
• Compromise is NOT always a good thing
• Quiet can be good, but it can also be very disturbing
• Feeling guilty doesn't accomplish anything
• Follow your gut! (Intuition may be a better word)
• Smile at folks, even strangers
• Microsoft messes with more than your computer
• Grampa Collins told a lot of "tall tales" that, as it turns out, weren't necessarily tall tales
• Golf is a sport that messes with you - as you mess with it
• It is fun to watch the wind
• Kids
• I hate lists so why am I making one?
• Fishing - it speaks for itself
• Philosophy - I get philosophical at the strangest moments
• We are all a little bit crazy - some of us more than others
• Happiness is a state of mind, body, and spirit
• To live in the moment is to truly live
• Sometimes I wake up exhausted!  It makes me wonder if reality occurs in my dreams or if the thing I think is reality is, in reality, a dream and that is why I wake up exhausted????
• Tears can be shed for many reasons - or, for no reason at all
• Did you know the lips have more nerve endings than any other spot on the human body?
• Sex is a good thing (I know, maybe that is TMI) - but it was one of my thoughts - frequently is
• No matter the time of year, trees are beautiful
• I forgot to put out the trash this morning - ah well, wasn't much to put out - that's a good thing, not making a lot of trash
• Sometimes I eat and I don't know why
• Friends - I have some I love and I have some I can't stand but I love anyway!
• Human contact - hmmmmmm (just a passing thought)
• Imagination is interesting, I can't imagine life without it - or can I - but, that would be imagining
• I like steak
• and Alaskan King Crab Legs
• and lots of other foods
• In some instances precision is important in others, it is a total waste of time and resources
• Love is
• Laughter can turn things around for the good
• Nuff said!

Tribute to Mommy - by Hailey J Dearman

Hailey J Dearman

Happy birthday to my beautiful mommy :) I couldn't ask for a better mom than her because she's simply the best. She brightens my day just be being around ♥ (hmm except when she wakes me up for school in the morning!) but other than that i'm so proud of her and everything she does for me and the family! This place is really chaos without her! I just hope she realizes how much she means to me. Can't imagine life without her. She's one of the strongest most influential people I know. My favorite quality about her? The way that she can keep smiling and laughing even when times are tough :) Love you mommy ♥ —

 

Afternote:  I could not pass posting this.... I am so proud of my children and grandchildren... and many times blessed by them and their love for each other.

Nothing to Say on February 1st 2013

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So Far, So Good

Well, here I am in Iowa once again.  Going to be spending some time with Mum and my Sibs - of course I'll be missing the lovely Carolyn!  She, me thinks, will be very busy while I'm here, probably even busier than when I'm there.

I drove through dense fog all day yesterday - taking only one travel day instead of too.  I find it very different driving a pickup than driving a car - I just don't get tired driving the pickup.  The fog has lifted a bit - but it is still hanging over us here at HoJac Acres.  The ice on the pond is almost black with goose droppings from the gaggles of geese that have wondered through and those that are hanging around hoping to steal food from the Runes (I'll have to learn how to spell that - these are not the alphabetical tiles that were used in ancient history - but a breed of duck similar to, but not a mallard.)

Last time I was here Charlie the Duck and I became good friends - he's no longer here - I think Jacque said a fox or something ate him.  Not a wonderful demise for such a wonderful bird-then again, nature has its ways.

During my stay I'm having to rely on a "Mobile Hot Spot" - we'll say how well that works.  I hope to do some painting (water colors), work out, lose a few pounds in the process - and do a lot of "reflecting".  This is a quiet place, even quieter than the neighborhood back home.  A wonderful way to enjoy wonderful moments!

Addendum: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rouen_Duck    the proper term and spelling for the duck is Rouen.  See the Wikipedia article.

Treasured Moments

There are 86400 moments - if you define a moment as one second - in a day.  That's a lot of moments - many of them can be considered "treasured moments".  I think it really depends on your perspective.  Any given moment is experienced by an individual, a group of individuals, a crowd, a world - like the moment the shot rang out that killed JFK - it is a moment I will never forget.  There are those special moments that only an individual experiences - like the moment I looked into Carolyn's eyes when I declared "I do" at our wedding...

There are moments shared - a first kiss - the birth of a child - and not to be trivialized, but the moments shared with a family when catching the big fish as a child.  These are treasured moments.  I think one treasures those moments by remembering them - not dwelling in them, but remembering them..  My most treasured moments are those moments that I can share with someone - especially sharing them with Carolyn or one of our children or grand children.

I also treasure those moments I share with my siblings - my mom - ...  I'll never forget the time she shared with me, guiding me when I tried to enter drawing contests, scolding me when I misbehaved.  I recall more of those moments when I see it is difficult for her to remember some of them. 

I don't intend nor do I desire to get maudlin as I write - it is just that sometimes..... like right now, I get lost in them - with a sense of joy. 

Treasure your moments....  live them to the fullest.... share them when it is right to share them - hold them close when it is right to hold them close!  Be yourself - love yourself - life is good!

Electricity

Zap, crackle, sparkle, plug it in, turn it on, it works......  all of a sudden it goes out.  It isn't one of those short two minute outages or just a glitch...  I'm lost without electricity.  What does one do.  I can only browse magazines and rarely read a book.  When the battery on the laptop goes dead I can't listen to books on audio.  With no "Hot Spot" gizzmo I can't get on the internet... Electricity is my friend.  I need it.  I need for all those things that I expect to work properly when I flip the on button or send the voice command.  I need it to access the internet.  Thank goodness the battery back up on the garage door opener worked this morning.

Starbucks, coffee, internet, electricity (only one outlet at this one - weird).  Claim my spot and life is good again. Of course, I could have just taken a nap or went for a long walk.  Carolyn did.  Went for a long walk that is.

Have a great day - enjoy your electricity and all it gives you!

Making Mom and Dad Proud

Heather and Kindle traveled to New York and appeared on CNN HLN and the Piers Morgan show.  They did this in support of our niece Ashley.  The girls were awesome and represented our family with humility, grace, tenderness, and love. 

I'm not sure... but ry a copy and paste..  If I were more technically "ept" I would be able to post the picture right here for you to see.  My final wish for this is that it helps raise the much needed funds for Ashley.  Someday, hopefully, she will share her story.....

https://fundrazr.com/campaigns/0NGG6

Oatmeal

Its lumpy, its filling, it can be plain, embellished, sweetened or not.  You can add liquid, or not.  They say it is good for your heart and lowering your cholesterol.  The quick oats are easy to make - steel cut requires more time.  Seems to evoke the name Quaker - though, there are many other brands. Cinnamon and sugar sometimes help.  Most of the time I just eat it plain, or with raisins or applesauce.

When I see it, it brings to mind stories where the kids and others talk about gruel.  It looks like a gruel.   By itself, it is kind of plain tasting - not much flavor -but I do like the texture for some odd reason and I don't mind eating eat without additives.  I think it appeals to my innate laziness - quick to make, easy to clean up after and a substantial meal.  There are times when I write about the silliest things - but I take some amount of pleasure in that.

When I was first in college I wrote a paper on the sensitivities and feelings of a blade of grass.  I have long since lost that paper.  For me, at this moment, it would make for some interesting background to my proclivity to writing much about nothing (I wrote a paper on that to - not in any way Shakespearean in quality)!

I'm going to change the look and feel of the blog again as I really don't care for some of the new formats such as mosaic and such.

I am looking forward to a lot of fabulous moments today... go Broncos - beat the Ravens!  Be in the moment, its the only way you can play the game! (and that means as much in life as it does in football)

Hmmmm - Showers

I don't know why and this is probably TMI - but I like to take showers... Love it.. i probably take to many.  Hey I even played some of my best golf in the rain.  What is it about showers and rain.  They cleanse, wash things away - more than just dirt I think.  A shower is like a renewal and a re-baptism.  It wakes one up to be open to all the available events and moments.  Carolyn thinks it has much deeper meaning than that. Like there was something that happened in my past and the showers help wash it away when it comes into my subconscious.  She may be right or I may be right, or, we both may be right. 

This "enlightenment" reminds me of a picture I took from our car window when we were driving to Iowa.  Of course, I know what I see in this picture.  What do you see?  It is absolutely beautiful, as is life, absolutely beautiful.  These are the kinds of things you see when you are "in the moment".  I'm thankful for each and every one of them.

Communications in a "Modern" World

Telephone- please leave a message - no one answers anymore, email - some folks don't read their email or even have it, text messaging (dating, sexting, whatevering), tweeting, Facebooking, "snail mail" (which of late has really become "slug mail" - even turtles could beat the USPS, paging (almost a thing of the past), Skyping..and I'm sure there are even more methods - well, like face-to-face.  Meet at Starbucks, Das Bog, Dunkin Donuts, Caribou, and/or a myriad of other places.  Oops, I almost forgot IM, Chat - which may be perhaps the most dependable of all of thee above except that not everyone does that either.

So what's the point of listing all of these potential methods of reaching someone you want to reach.  Each has some advantages and disadvantages.  My problem is that even my kids, and there are only four of them - plus their spouses and various other family members - tend to communicate (or be communicated to) in different styles.  It is like being a detective trying to determine which is the best way to communicate with each of them.  For really important, future, family stuff I used to rely on the USPS.  Until we, Carolyn and I, discovered that the invitations to a party we sent out didn't get to most of them until after the party - which no one attended - occurred.  Lesson learned there - if you are mailing invitations - take them directly to the post office and not a drop box and get them out 5-6 weeks ahead of time, and RSVP caveat - which may or may not be heeded.  That was reinforced when we recently emailed and telephoned an invitation - albeit - only 10 days in advance - an invitation to a New Years Day open house - without an RSVP.  We were prepared - no one showed - what do you do with all that food and unused love???  It can be sad and disappointing.  But, in the end I have no one to blame but myself?? For not choosing the right method of communication.

These days - the person I communicate most with is Carolyn.  Well, we do live in the same house (though there are times when we have trouble finding each other in this house).  But, for the most part when Carolyn and I do want to communicate with each other it is not a problem.. I know all I have to do is find her for a face to face - or, call her and if (I do mean if) her phone is turned on and accessible - she'll answer.  Further, if I do leave her a message, she will always call me back. 

The next person that I most often communicate with is my LB - Mike.  He and I enjoy an on-line game (Mafia Wars) together.  And once or twice a day we chat while playing the game.  I love it.  LS - is on-line once in awhile too - so, makes it nice.

For the extended family, Facebook and a private family "group" makes a nice way to communicate - so I hear from the extended family fairly frequently.  The Martinez clan is pretty good at that - the Fahlenkamp clan less so. 

The bottom line for me is that for some occasions, get together s, parties and such -- pre-planning and making a communication plan (I abhor plans) may be the best thing to do.  I don't know - maybe I'm just "communications challenged".  Maybe I should just bug the kids with phone calls until they answer and get a commitment right then and there!  But, I know I hate that because we have a certain relative who does that and it drives me crazy... eventually though we do respond and the individual pretty much gets what they want.. but sometimes begrudgingly - so probably not the best way. 

I think the most important thing to remember is that no matter who we communicate - we usually are communicating out of love and a desire to be somehow closer to the one we are attempting to communicate - so don't give up Lanny.  It may be difficult to learn what is the best way to reach someone... but eventually you will.  And, if it turns out to be different for each family member or friend then so be it.... if you love em you'll make every attempt to communicate in the way that works best for them ...  that's love.  (but, like love, its still confusing, and sometimes frustrating!)

Mosaics and New Years Day

Well, the open house was a bust!!!  Next time we'll have to do formal, postal invitations sent out at least one month ahead of time.  Lesson learned, perhaps!  We did have the grandsons over and that was very nice.  I believe they had a good time - they really entertained each other.  They even helped with a bit of house cleaning. 

"Last night I had the strangest dream".. a song isn't it.  Well, my dream was full of an eclectic collection of hallways and people.  For the most part I was "floating", yes, floating - yet talking to all the participants.  In one part of the dream two women (CN and BS) entered the room.  I knew they were there to "fire" me or lay me off - so, I just quit.  I did stay the rest of the day and helped to teach a class.  Then I went down to the "secret vaults" and tried to locate some old documents. 

I tried to go back to CN because another person explained to me that the reason I was layed off was because of some jury testimony I gave some years earlier and because I was too "relaxed" in my attitude - oh well.  I really did enjoy the floating/flying part though.  I was actually able to do some pretty nifty trick flying by the end of the dream.  But it must (the flying) make one tired because I am up and I am tired.  But, I'm also laughing at myself

I really don't have anything intelligent to write today.  I do want to complete my workout, so I'll be heading off to do that in an hour or so.  Maybe I'll bake a trip to the recreation center today-- maybe.

Anyhow - to all of you ones and twos out there that read this... have a great day!

Happy New Year 2013...

Speaking of "blank pages".... that well describes the year 2013.  365 blank sheets of paper ready to be filled with life's moments.  Those moments will (have already) include joy, sorrow, pleasure, pain, adventure, boredom, meeting new people, going new places, consciousness,  oblivion, sites that bring tears and sites that bring laughter.  So much that it feels like the proverbial "cup runneth over" - for it truly does.

I'm already thinking about reunions, Canada and fishing, Colorado and fishing, golf, golf, golf and more golf, Eureka Springs, Montezuma, kids and grandkids.... each day and each moment of each day a true celebration of life.

Someone reading this may think this guy is living in the clouds somewhere and has no clue what he is bantering on about.  To them I say... it is better to have no clue and discover than it is to think you know absolutely everything and go through life without the twists, turns, and surprises.

Love, ah love........  that to is a blank slate - we are in our 46th year of marriage.. and every single day is like a new adventure (though there are a few routines) -- but there are always surprises.  Thinking of my Carolyn makes me tingle all over with wonderment and happiness.  You should see the smile on my face!

So, bottom line, WAKE UP!!!!!

The Day Before New Beginnings Day

I really enjoyed watching the Broncos cream KC yesterday.  It was especially fun because I was with family - Chad and his gang in Parker.  The food was great too, and the scotch... but, especially the company.  Carolyn went to see a play with Autumn, Kairi, and Tarra (not sure of spelling).

Today will be a day for reflection and living in the moment.. with a few moments of looking into the mirror of the year to come. I've come to the conclusion that I like quiet... Not a lot of talking going on around me.  Maybe that's why hermitage doesn't sound so bad.

My mind is overwhelmed with a lot of "nonsense" this morning.  Why is that.  It just is what it is - to quote a cliche' . 

I'm thinking I should post a picture here somewhere - but, a picture of what.  Suddenly, and it isn't unusual, I've gone totally blank.  sort of like the rest of this electronic sheet of paper!  Ooops, I couldn't help myself.

The Day Before the Last Day of 2012

Sitting here playing Mafia Wars, Reviewing video tapes on DVD and cataloging them in a new FMP database.  Finally getting things in order so I can later put some quality stuff together.  I also have a project to finish for Heather.  That's actually what I'm working on right now.

At the moment I'm wishing I had a new, faster computer with a 1 Terra byte drive.

Watching the videos, trying to determine dates.. mostly by the age of the kids and time of the year.  Sure is fun though.  You can tell by watching what great parents Heather and Eric are.  The kids seem to be so "free spirited".  

Speaking of "free Spirits", I think I have some in the cupboard.  Might be time for a Sunday morning Bloody Mary...  Excuse me for a few minutes whilst I make one!  (Made... I had to fold my laundry too!)

Well, as for the rest of the day, I'm looking forward to watching the game with the Fahlenkamps in Parker.  Who knows what else the day will bring.  Let the surprises and fun begin.

Reminising

I've started a project of cataloging all of the old VHS, Super 8, Digital 8 and other videos that I have transcribed to DVD.  It is an arduous, but very loving task.  This morning I watched a video of a Collins family reunion held at a hotel in Iowa.  All of Mom's brothers and sisters will still alive at the time.  Now it is only Mom and Uncle Jim.  It is strange that I can not remember many of my cousins names... We did not live close together, nor were we necessarily a very close family - I'm nos sure I ever knew some of their names at all - especially Uncle Lew and Aunt Delores's kids, and Uncle Jimmy and Kathy's kids.

Carolyn's family and the kids and cousins are much closer - maybe it is part of Hispanic culture - or maybe it is just their nature.  There are wonderful videos of past Christmas celebrations, birthdays, vacations, and just fooling around.  My next part of the project will be to make the most of these memories....  Spend a little time in the past.

Adagio from Piano Concerto No 5

Played by the Archangelos Chamber Ensemble.  Certain music touches me to the very core... this is one of them.  As I listen I visualize so much and feel so much emotion - right to the very depths of my heart.  I am thankful for all that I have been given - mostly for the people in my life - for Carolyn our children and grandchildren, for Mom and Dad and all of my brothers and sisters... very their parents... for Carolyn's family Joseph and Margaret and all of their kids and spouses and family.  I am thankful for all the people I had the pleasure of knowing at Lockheed Martin and House of TV Repair and Ellis Superette, the United States Air Force, the Easter Islanders..AFTAC friends and families.   I am thankful for all the teachers and professors that tried to teach me.  I am thankful for neighbors past and present.  I am thankful for all those who have provided service, paper boys and girls, postal workers, store clerks, for people like Virgil and Goodyear and Art. I am thankful for all the players that I have had the pleasure to golf with, the Loggie's Leagure, Fitzsimons Men's Association, the Myrtle Beach gang.  I am thankful for the folks I've had the pleasure to sing with, play with, study with.  I'm thankful for the priests in my life-especially Father Nevans - I am thankful for the couples we worked with in World Wide Marriage Encounter and for their families.

It never ceases to amaze me the number of folks that touch us in our lives.. and from each and every one of them we learn something.  I am thankful for you-- whoever you are and wherever you are, for whatever you do and for whatever talents you have - I am thankful!

Christmas Day 2012... 3:23 AM or So

I'm not sure why it is that I'm having a somewhat "sleepless" night.  It occurs from time to time, this is one of those times.  I was hoping one of my sibs from Iowa would be on-line today so that I could arrange to meet with Mum via Skype.  I am committed to calling each of them later today.

Carolyn and I are pretty much "alone" today at least for now, and pretty much were alone yesterday.  Rosana dropped by - she was taking Kairi and Tyler and her sister to the movies.  I can't wait to see the new Hobbit flick.  It looks to be a really great adventure.

There are lots of things to think about in the next few weeks:

• Canada 2013 - I think we need to renew our passports
• Myrtle Beach - picking dates may be tougher than usual.  I'm thinking about sending a survey via Survey Monkey to the guys.  We have to decide when, where, how many rounds - lots of decisions.
• Travel - Branson, and where ever else we decide to go.  
• Our April trip - Carolyn has a conference in Erueka Springs, I'm gonna go fishing
• Golf - one thing I really enjoy - and I've improved immensely.  I've got my handicap down to a bit over 12.
• Letting go of the tragic events that have occurred in 2012 - both personally and well, publicly
• Lew's fight with cancer
• Replacing some of the flooring in the new house
• Finally fixing the sprinkler system at the old digs
• Being thankful for so much that there is to be thankful
• Living in the moment
• Supporting Carolyn in her many endeavors
• Continuing with WTF and personal training
•  De- cluttering  - that means removing things that we no longer need or use - there's a lot of that
•  A new, more powerful computer... I've been meaning to make some movies from old clips, gotta do it - Just Do It

As I make this "list" I am reminded that I really don't like lists. So, enough for now.  I'm looking forward to a wonderful day.  Please, have one yourself.  Happy Hollidays!

2nd Snow 2012 - Late October

It isn't yet Halloween and we've had our second snow.  This was a bigger snow than the first, but no less beautiful.  Most of the fall leaves have dropped to the ground in some big winds.  We had a little over 4" this time - still no shoveling required as the concrete and blacktop still retain enough heat to melt the white stuff away. 

I'm not sure why I've waited until this time to write again - it has been somewhat of a melancholy week.  We had the memorial service for Veronica.  I realize once again Friday morning that while the Tuesday service brought some closure, there is still a lot of emotion buried within my heart and soul.  We had a blessing of many of the grandkids and a lot of their cousins stay over on Friday night.  I will share some pictures on Facebook.

Our Fall Colors Front Yard Tree

Sunday morning.  We are headed for Starbucks - part of our infrequent of late - Sunday morning ritual.  The Broncos play today.  They are off to a pretty good start with their new quarter back PFM. 

I'll be playing winter golf.  I'm overly sensitive... has nothing at all to do with golf -- just noted it.

There is a lot going on right now mentally and emotionally.  Part of it is Colorado family and part of it is Iowa family, part of it is the onset of winter perhaps.  I've been thinking about getting some help, but, I'm also tending to put that off.  We are getting ready to head for Iowa for a few weeks.  We will be spending Thanksgiving their this year.  I need to take care of some things before going - sprinkler system is done, but hoses and outdoor faucets need taken care of.  I also need to do some protection of the indoor main water station.

This is date day.....  should be fun although I haven't started it off quite right - a bit snappy me thinks.  Live your moments well!

1st Snow Fall 2012

There's something special about a first snow.  On the ground, grass still green, leaves on the trees haven't changed colors yet.. At least most leaves.  It is pristine, beautiful.  The tree with red berries dusted with one half an inch or so - the squirrels haven't started eating them yet.  They save the berries for the later months of winter.

The pond looks more peaceful, rimmed with a pearl necklace and just a trace of bird tracks.  It should all be gone by 2 this afternoon.  Life is good... 

Just Because

Just because it has been awhile.  There is so much going on between the Aurora Theater Tragedy, family, little brother Lew, Carolyn and I, the golf game and discussion topics.  I've put together a list of topics to discuss with Carolyn - I never new we had so much to talk about.

I have started my personal training with Wendfal.  She is very good at this.  I've already seen progress in just two sessions.  I have more soreness, but it is good soreness and I've noticed improvement in my focus, endurance, fleflexibility and attitude since I've started these sessions.  I've set up some goals and am concentrating on being more disciplined about my stretching exercises, good eating, and passion about life.

I took a golf lesson (I like to call them coaching sessions) from Dan at Fitz.  We worked on alignment and aiming.  The bonus from the session was learning that I do not need to change my natural swing, but, I can work with my natural swing to improve my game.  For me that means slightly different aiming points for wedges, mid-irons, and long irons.  We  also discovered that I am able to hit a very decent drive aiming right down the middle of the fairway.  I played Ute Creek yesterday.  What a beautiful morning and what a great round of golf on a non-home course.  I shot an 80 - that's 16 strokes better than I had ever played there before.  I hit 75% of the fairways, had a putting average of 1.88, 3 sand saves and 50% greens in regulation.

Last Thursday I had an unbelievable 72 at Fitz - my home course.  The surprise is that I only hit 53% of fairways,  but I had a 1.66 putting average - that is a lot of one putts. I firmly believe that my pre-shot routine is helping a lot.  I know darn well that the coaching session is going to benefit me greatly and also that doing the Personal Training is going to make a huge difference in my golf game as well as my life.

Golf, right now, and Carolyn are the things that are keeping me sane and vital during this time of chaos, emotion, and insanity.  I've made a commitment to call mom more often - so far so good.  They are brief, but important conversations.  I've also made a note card and a promise to myself to contact my sibs more frequently.  Now I need to carry through and find out if I even have all their phone numbers correct..


The lesson in all of this - is something I've always known and something I strive to continue and that is to "live in the moment" - it is definitely the place to be.  Love to all - stay tuned in life!

what to write

Another Sleepless Night

Kindle wrote a beautiful story. http://cowbird.com/story/37304    I'm at a loss for words.  Something that doesn't happen to often with me.  Life has changed forever.  I guess it does change forever every day, because each day and each moment leads to a new day and a new moment so nothing is really different about change ... but, it does somehow feel that some moments have more impact than others. The Aurora Theater Event was one of those moments.  I can only imagine the lives that have been changed.

I think that sometimes I dwell on that far too much.... tonight is a sleepless one.  I've had some of those lately.  I do need to read Kindle's story again... because it is certainly right on about family.  We have somehow become closer and more aware of each other.  It is still very hard to see that "event" as a blessing in disguise - because, it isn't - at least it does not feel like one.

I can not write as eloquently as Kindle... Nor do I seem to have the passion of Heather  - the stamina of Chad - or the wonderful sense of joy that Jeremiah has...  What I do have, is a family I love - a family who loves me... a very, very, very special Carolyn.  There is the blessing in the moment.  We have enjoyed more than 47 years together, 45 of them married.  We have 4 awesome children and 8 awesome grandchildren.  We are healthy.  I have mom who is doing okay and 6 wonderful brothers and sisters.. I have Carolyn's brothers and sisters and their loved ones - we are family and those are all blessings.. Ashley is getting better, that is a blessing!  I do have countless blessings.  It is good to recall these things from time to time.  It has helped in this moment.  Maybe, just maybe, some of these words will help someone else too.... What else can I say.

Visiting Ashley

It has been two weeks.  We were able to see Ashley today - still in the ICU.  We were pleasantly surprised to see a vibrant, beautiful, very calm, forward looking young lady.  She is looking forward to getting out of ICU and going to a standard medical ward then on to Craig Rehabilitation.

There is to be a benefit at Bar Louie's on Sunday August 4th.  America and the world hav been generous with the silent auction items -- everything from Broncos signed footballs, golf rounds, dinner tickets, to coffee.  Please go to HelpAsh.org for more information on any way that you can help. 

Our family is overwhelmed by the kindness and generosity of friends, family, and perfect strangers.  Thank you to all..... for your prayers and for your generosity in all things.

A Sleepless Night

Thousands of voices - where do they come from - longing to be heard either as individual voices or thousands of voices as one single voice.  Let us be heard.  I'm not speaking in riddles nor am I being - the words leave me for some odd reason.  So if this is read it will be read and a message will only be found if there is a message to be found by the reader.

Our children - the family cousins have come together very creatively to support their cousin in need.  Reference  HelpAsh.org   .  

I thought I had something to write this morning!  But, words have left me for now.  Perhaps it is better to have a blank mind - one that can be written upon by what is in the present moment, sort of a meditation.  I return to that moment, this moment with an open heart and an open mind knowing that what is, is, and what is to be has not yet been determined but will unfold depending on the moment to moment choices that I make.

Life Changes Forever - in a Split Moment

I am one who truly believes in living in the moment - not lingering or dwelling in the past - not lingering or dwelling too much in the future.  I do realize that there is much to be learned from review of past moments - and that one does need to plan for the future.  I wouldn't be enjoying family, friends, retirement, and so much else if I hadn't planned for the future.  But - it is still almost unfathamable so many lives can be changed in the few moments and split seconds that occurred last Thursday.  A family evening to be enjoyed - lives senslessly snubbed out of existence and many more immeasurably changed forever.

I have experienced feelings of anger and hurt that I've never experienced before.  But I've also experienced and outpouring of love and deep binding relationships with family, friends, even strangers.  Yesterday as I was returning home - I had this overwhelming urge that I wanted to beat the crap out of something....  I called LB and we talked - he was there for me and we talked through some of the rage - it was rage.  I shouldn't even have been driving.  Today, there is a calmness - not yet an acceptance, I think, of what is transpiring.

There is much in the news - a lot of which is not accurate - but I guess people do hunger to know something and to know more - even complete strangers.  In the end, I think, the inaccuracies will be corrected and families will pull even closer together than ever before.  I don't think it changes so much our care values or even maybe our attitudes... some of us have been developing and living with those for many years.  But, these events do change, maybe, our perspectives a bit and how we may act toward others.  Maybe that is my imagination, maybe not.  Today I'm writing because it helps to write - sometimes it helps even to talk to a perfect stranger!  They listen differently, without judgement or subjectivity perhaps.

I've played a few rounds of golf since the 20th... it has helped to be with friends and to get out of doors.  It helps to feel "normal" for a bit.  Because right at this moment though I feel normal, I feel emotionally different.  The past week has been like a roller coaster of anger, sadness, joy, crying, laughter, screaming -- I've not yet taken a baseball bat or sledge hammer to anything... not yet.  Yesterday I started looking for one of those punching dummies... the kind you bash and they get right back up... maybe that is what I'm feeling... like a punching dummy - maybe our family is feeling that - we've been punched hard - real hard... but, like the punching dummy, we'll get right back up!  Live your moments and live them well, life changes forever - in a split moment!

Words are Insufficient - Tragedy Strikes Home

One never thinks of tragedies like the Centry 16 murders could hit home.  Our niece and her daughter (our grand niece) were both victims of this senseless act.  The child was shot three times and did not make it.  Her mother, Ashley, is still in intensive care and may never be able to walk again - she still has a bullet lodged next to her spine.  I cannot imagine a young parent, any parent for that matter losing a child or grandchild or having to tell someone, especially your child, that their child was killed.  I cannot fathom what her parents are going through.  As much as it touches other family members, friends, and relatives - those immediately impacted so devastatingly will never be the same again - their lives - ours- changed forever.

It is almost unimagineable how many lives are touched by this - 12 deaths, 59 injured - some critical yet... there immediate families, relatives, shool mates, friends - so many, many lives are touched by this thing. 

While there are those who reach out to comfort, there are also those who prey on the victims and their families - almost with no concern for the family, just concern for their careers and "everyone's right to know" irregardless of the impact on the victims and their families. 

We have very talented folks in our family - at one of our reunions - my family won a family tree quilt - it is beautiful and now cherished even more than ever ..  .  The leaves for Veronica and Ashley had hearts placed on them yesterday...  this keeps them very much in our minds. 

So many have reached out to us and are very supportive - asking what they can do - even we family members struggle to do more, not often knowing exactly what kind of support is needed for the children and their families.  Carolyn and I are blessed to have a home to share with family and children while adults are visiting and sharing with each other at the hospital.  I think - at least for me, I feel helpless to help at times - not wanting to intrude - but wanting to be supportive in any way that I can... sometimes that can just be a hug - sharing tears - and moments that we have together. 

There is going to be a special family vigil tonight in Aurora - President Obama will be there - I'm not sure I want to be there.  I don't want this thing to be political - it is about caring, family, love, concern.  None of us, I think, will ever fully understand what made Holmes do what he did - something so callous and heartless.  He will never understand how much pain he has caused.

The following days will bring so much emotion.... and for a guy who wears his heart on his sleeve, that is going to be a lot of emotion....  I'm so fortunate to have Carolyn, supportive children and grandchildren... and so fortunate that they were not at that theater on that night... My heart flutters with joy and thankfulness - yet bleeds for the many, many victims...   thank you family and friends, neighbors, strangers, and all others for your thoughts, prayers, and support - especially for Ashley and her immediate family. 

A Birthday and Some Great Drives

Something worth blogging.  Celebrated a birthday on the 10th.  Couldn't have been better - all the kids and grandkids were here - spouses and a few others.  It was great.  I did the steaks - they ate them up and sang happy birthday... what a wonderful evening.

Played golf today - 43/40 - I was hitting the driver unbelievably well.  I had two drives over 260.  All but three of the drives were in the fairway.  The three there were not in the fairway were in the first cut.  I was putting well, but my short game still left something to be desired - still 83 is a great score for me.

Carolyn and I went shopping and picked out some furniture for the upstairs "great room" or family room, whatever one wishes to call it.

Today we played Coyote Creek, tomorrow it is Plum Creek, Wednesday Fitz, and Thursday Glenmore (not sure of the spelling).

This Past Wednesday - An Awesome Round

Of golf, of course.  Chuck and I were teamed up for the two man scramble.  We shot a 70 which worked out to a 47.43 net!  We had the best net and were not far from low gross.  Chuck was putting lights out.  I was hitting my irons more confidently and better than I have in some time.  The consistency and very relaxed atmosphere was good and contributed to the great results.

I still have not finished the Myrtle Beach final report - Mil is a tough one to follow when it comes to that kind of "writing".  Oh well, I will get it done - this weekend!

Have a great day.

MB 2012 Day...

Oyster Bay - bad shape
Glen Dornoch - beat us

Boundry House Restaurant in Calabash SC  Excellent
I won the "gator" a dubious honor
Only one round on the last day.

Don't make Glen Dornoch the last course played - too tough

suggestions of one round a day (no days with 2 rounds)

MB 2012 Day 6:

Burn the onions until they are unrecognizable
won the Banana Split Battle (bob and I)
Couldn't hit a 3 wood to save my life
Played with the same ball through 17 holes then - blew it
Lost the gator - yeah
Ahead for the gator by 2 over all, yuchhhhh
Went through a dozen golf balls in the last two days
I had some great sand shots today
Pictures at Kirk's Ice Cream

MB 2012 Day 5: Beautiful Day

We played Heathland and Moorland at the Legends today.  We actually played and played pretty well.  My drives were definitely much better than yesterday and far more consistent.  I couldn't putt worth a darn though. I'd have to look and see what my scores are.  The "statistician" (Bob) hasn't done the computations for the day yet - can't blame him - they just got back from dinner after today's 36 holes of golf.

I think the courses here are in excellent shape - not sure everyone agrees, but they maybe have higher standards than I do.

I got a new Golf Buddy Platinum before coming down here.  I think I'm finally figuring it all out.  I still haven't got the shot distance bit down properly.  But, I have the score keeping, handicapping, pin placement, and most of the other stuff figured out.  I do like it, though I think the screen is a bit dim and the touch screen is a little unresponsive at times.

Alas, we only have four rounds left to play - Barefoot (Fazio and Love), and down to North Carolina for Oyster Bay and Glen Dornoch.  So - some real challenges still left.  Oh, by the way, I got the gator again - arggg.

MB 2012 Day 4 : The Courses Won

Golf - some days you feel you give the course a decent challenge.  Other days, the courses just bring you to your knees.  Yesterday was one of those days.  Between lost ..... backpacks, card cases, - all kinds of stuff we did manage to get to the second tee in time.  turns out the lost stuff was between the seats of the van, and back at the condo.... Despite the fact that the courses beat us, we did enjoy them as we always do.  They are beautiful places.

We stopped at Hanser House for dinner.  They serve way too much and it is way good.  I brought home leftovers for Saturday evening.  I'll be eating just fine.

I didn't take any pictures today.  I think I've got a lot from the past - of these two courses.  I did drop out of the "competitive" play - because, well, I just wasn't enjoying the golf and the surroundings as much.

Yumm, the left over flounder is really good.

Well - more later or NOT.  Take care enjoy life... live it fully.

MB 2012 Day 3: The Sun Was Nice

It was a "bright, bright, sun shiny day".  A nice change.  We enjoyed Kings North at Mytrle Beach National golf courses.  It is a really beautiful golf course.  I didn't play beautifully - but did improve over yesterday by two strokes.  I did however win "gator" honors again.  Not something I'm proud of.  My partner today, Mil, shot lights out - as did my match opponent, Bob - shooting an awesome 78.  He was on!  I couldn't hit a drive to save my life.  I did, however, birdie the very tough signature hole.  All in all it was a good day of golfing.

We ate lunch at Ruby Tuesdays - I had a salad.  We at supper at Cagney's Prime Rib and Lobster House.  The prime rib was  - how should I put this - bad!  And, for a prime rib house - bad prime rib is really bad.  It will NOT be on our repeat list of restaurants.

Tomorrow we head for two of our favorite golf courses, Heritage Plantation
 ( http://www.legendsgolf.com/heritageclub ), and Caledonia Fish and Golf club
( http://www.fishclub.com/caledonia/photo-tour/ .  I'm looking forward to those courses. Heritage has huge greens and lots of water.  Caledonia - well, it is beautiful and typically very well "groomed".

The picture for today:

Mallard - Just liked taking this picture..

 Well, yes, it is a duck.  A Mallard to be specific - he was out for a swim (stroll or paddle) with his lady.  I had a picture of both of them - but, he just looked so cool.  Almost as good as the form of the golfer below.  Note the awesome follow through.

Unfortunately I pulled the ball left of the green and took a four on this par 3.  Everybody else parred the hole.

Lanny's Follow Through - good form, eh?

MB 2012 Day 2: More Fun to Fish in the Rain than Golf in the Rain

Go figure.  It started gently enough but soon developed into a steady drizzle then 16 holes of, well, rain.  After 9 I stopped into the pro shop and bought some rain gear.  I stayed pretty much dry the last 9 holes.  We did, however, decide to switch the afternoon round to later in the week.  The other guys took off to the movies and dinner - I elected to get some solitary time.  The golf was, well, what it was.  I had a 49/50 with an 11 on one hole on the back.  I won dots.  I won 1.5 of the team thingy.  I lost my match on the 18th hole.  Bob still rules.

I do have a photo of me in my dashing new rain gear.  Oops, I earned the "gator" today.  Can't forget that.  So tomorrow, at King's North - I'll have to display it proudly.  The gator seemed to enjoy the weather.  I can't say so much for the rest of the guys.  Like I side fishing is more fun than golf when it is raining.  I'd post the guy's pictures, but, don't have their permission.  By the way - I lost 5 balls today (2 Water Hazard + 3 Hazard).  But, I found 8 - pretty nice ones so I still came out ahead.  Now that I think of it that's 5 penalty strokes (3 of them on one hole) - lots of room for improvement.

Oh, yeah, there is lots of water at Arnie's course.  http://www.mbn.com/courses/profiles/?id=60  Well, the rain suit and club head covers are all dried out now.  Time to put things back in the bag and relax.  I love this place.  I love golf, fishing, but most of all I love Carolyn.....

Please enjoy your moments.  I know I'll be enjoying mine.

2012 MB Day One

Arrived safely - ate dinner at the Sea Captain down on the beach.  Beautiful view of the ocean and a great meal, flounder (broiled), steamed veggies, simple salad, and a few (just a few) delicious hush puppies.

Golf Gator - Awarded
 After Each MB Round (for MOST water  balls)

We (Mil and I) checked in after Gordon and Bob - so it was that I found the "gator" clipped to my headboard. WRONG.  Someone (Mil) protected my name and moved it to the headboard of the appropriate "awardee" from the 2011 trip.

Tomorrow it begins in earnest.  We'll be playing Parkland and Heathland at the Legends.  ( http://legendsgolf.com/  )  We'll be playing all 5 of the Legends golf courses while down here.  Each course is very different so provides lots of challenge and fun.  Wheels up at 6:30, even though we are playing right here - gotta have breakfast and hit some balls before our 7:32 tee time.

I got my new "Golf Buddy Platinum".  I'm looking forward to using it on the course instead of just practicing previewing courses.

Oh, by the way - the trip to Canada was great.  We stopped by Montezuma on the way back and got to have a short visit with all my siblings and mom.

I bought some golf balls today - I've tried the GamerV2 - like it.  I'm also going to try the Bridgestone "Fix" - we'll see what happens.  I'll let you know.  Let's see - Match play with Bob, Dots with Mil, and team Quota with everyone - Gordon and I are partners tomorrow - coin flip decided it.

Belated Posting from 5/29/2012

The weather has been miserable, but the fishing has been absolutely fantastic.  So far I have landed the largest walleye - 22.5".  Jack had a 21".  I had another that measured at 20".  We've all caught a lot of 18" (have to put them back) - we put anything over 17.5" back.  One is allowed to keep one fish over 18" with a possession limit of 2 (on a conservation license).  That includes the ones in your belly for the day - so no, you can't eat one and have two more.  It just doesn't work that way.

Rain, rain, rain, rain… that's about all it does, and my rain gear really sucks.  So, I'll be better prepared next year and it probably won't rain at all -- and that is okay.  Carolyn went fishing with me yesterday - she out-fished me.  She's a trooper. 

We made Salmon patties for breakfast this morning.  Enjoyed burgers (blackbean and hamburger) last evening.

The trip up was good.  It took the full two days.  We spent the second night in Dryden.  It made for an easy drive to camp the next morning and I was out on the lake by about 10AM.  We are debating an early departure as I have a flight to catch on Tuesday morning.

There is absolutely no internet connection this year, so I can't post a more timely blog.  

Tears - and Other Stuff

We were up a little early this morning.  It has been a habit of late - about 5:30AM give or take a few minutes.  Partly, I think, because of the grandpets.  We are sitting while Kindle is in Boston with Drew - they'll be coming home soon.  It will be good to see Drew again and have them both here until the fall.  Then it will be back to school for Drew and perhaps - I hope, especially for Kindle - they will be together full time in Boston.

I cut some peonies for Carolyn this morning. We floated them in a Crystal bowl.  They are beautiful - pure white - and then, I thought about dad.  I do miss him and think of him often.  The faucets (tear ducts) turned on to a gentle flow.  He taught me so much and what is good is that I had the opportunity to thank him for that.  I think the tears are both a bit of thankfulness for the blessing that he was, for the service to our country, for the father that he was - stern but fair - and so very bright and full of life.

Carolyn and I will be headed to Canada in a few days.  The boat has been on the water twice now and is working well.  The Minkota electric works okay - there is a broken tab on the mounting bracket.  That isn't so bad when you are going forward, but it wreaks havoc when going backwards - what to do about that.  Maybe nothing this trip.  I don't use the motor that much -  although I did test the other day using only the electric for about 3 solid hours and still having plenty of juice to start the Merc and load the boat onto the trailer.

I've got a few things left to do around the house then run through the final check list with Carolyn.  More tears - I'm so blessed to have her in my life - she brings so much joy - and is so very giving and open to so much adventure and new things and yes, even a few things some might consider a bit weird.  But, she is her own woman and she is always learning - always.

Me - lately I've been Mr. Fix it, at the old house and the new.  I've got to get the drip system repaired and the whole sprinkler system at the old place.  Maybe I'll go fish for some catfish this evening.  I've not done that in a long while.  Then again, maybe I'll do something else - whatever it is I want to do.  Maybe Carolyn will even come along with me.  I'll be spending the morning with her.  We will be having lunch with Autumn today.  That will be nice.

Enjoy your moments and your day.... I know I'll be enjoying mine!

The ShoreLandr, The Mercury, the Microwave, and GOLF????

So, you know the trailer broke.  But, the part (Spring Bracket) got here and I got it installed - thank you ShoreLandr and Crowley Marine for getting it all done in such a timely fashion.  I finally got the other bracket inspected - it is pristine!  Bottom line - the boat has been in the water, the Merc works great - doesn't miss a beat - I even caught an 8" trout, and two 4" crappies... I didn't know they came that small - oh well.  Canada here we come.  I think I'll get it on the water a couple of more times.  Nice to be only 5.7 miles to the boat rampI

The Microwave - well the store manager says one size fits all  --  wrong, there's 26" and then there's well a lot bigger - 30".  Fortunately there is room in the wall cabinet for the modifications to make it work - so I will.  (Back story - the old built in Microwave crashed - so needed to replace - the new one is powerful and has convection cooking as well as mircrowave...)  Now, if only I can saw in a straight line!

GOLF - well it isn't exactly in the same category as trailers, boat motors, and microwaves - but.  Lately I've been having a great 1st 9 holes and a lousy (I mean no matter what hole we start on--) and a bad last nine holes, by as much as 12 strokes difference.  So, this week I noticed something about my game.. If I drive the ball in the rough or some other strange place.. my following shots are good and I score well.  If I put the ball down the center of the fairway, my following shots suck.  Duh - I say to myself what the heck.  I think that one I'm "recovering" from a bad shot I concentrate better on the next shot resulting in a good score for the hole.  If I have a great tee shot I tend to let up and don't score as well.  Sooooooo -- lesson learned.. I think.

Anyhow life is fantabulous, the sky is beautiful, and the lawn is lush and green..  Have a great year!

What Am I doing At this Time of Day?

Well, for one thing, I do know it is very early - 3:45 AM.  My mind is just racing.  I had this strange dream about throwing a green tomato at a house - then offering the green tomato to my friends to eat.  They all said they liked "fried green tomatoes" ... except for the person who lived in the house - she said "I'll never eat part of that tomato."  How weird is that?

I'm looking out my study window - obviously I'm writing, but I'm also prepping an old HP Media PC to give to Kairi -- but really, this statement started with - looking out my study window - the moon is awesome!  A beautiful bright white - with the old man in the moon face looking gently down on the sleepy neighborhood.  I think I'd like a cup of coffee, my stomach feels a bit empty.

Today is the last "fix it" day for the old house before Miah gets back from his trip to Seattle - a Zumeiz management meeting.  He loves those "management meetings" - really, he does.  He says it is a fantastic company to work for.  I'm so glad he really likes what he is doing.

(Just had an IM with LS - technology can be a wonderful thing!)  Oh yah, on the "mind racing" thing -- it is a very slow race.....!

And we've reached the finish line.  TTFN - may all your moments be wonderful!

Well Heck - Time to Write eH

Yes, it has been almost one month.  I've been doing these fewer and farer between posts.  Not that I'm lazy or don't have anything to write - more like retirement keeps one very very busy.  The weather has kept things cool the past few days.  My golf game is erratic at best - like 39 on the front and 50 on the back (or worse).  I need to break all my drivers.

My boat trailer is broken.. but, the good news, I think Wendfal's dad can fix the broken part.  He picked it up Saturday - even after I screwed up the directions to our house.  For some reason I always get Prentice and Progress Drive ( we live on Progress Avenue) mixed up. 

Today is a drizzly day and cool, less than 50 degrees. Instead of golfing I'm sitting here catching up on paperwork, blogs, websites, games, solitude, and mostly thinking about the upcoming trip to Canada.  It is an annual outing with LS (that's "Little Sister"), Jack, and her "guest" of the year.  I told Wolfgang I was sorry not to take him this year, but I needed another driver.  Last year I did all the driving (2800 miles round trip)... and it is tiring -- at least for me.  Carolyn and I have a newer truck now.  She likes driving the pickup - so, she will be sharing the driving duties.  She's okay with that, as long as I promised to stop at the "Alien Cafe" in South Dakota.  (Yes, the food was pretty good! - so it is worth the short side trip... gotta fill the tank anyhow.)

I'm anxious to get the trailer fixed so I can get the boat out on the water and test it out.  I beat it up pretty bad last year.  Wolfgang remembers.

So, enough for the moment - may all your moments be wonderful! Awesome!  Fantastic! Joyful! and filled with love!

Cabins, Stables, Lake -- Oh My!!!

I think I finally have something worth blogging about again.  Carolyn and I are in Eureka Springs for a UFO conference - well, she's here for the conference - I'm here to try and finish my taxes by the deadline..... but, and it is a BIG BUT ( not mine mind you - different context)!!!  We are also here to evaluate something up the road near Branson.

I remember calling brother Michael about 30 some years ago and telling him we should buy a small resort - horses, tables, fishing , cabins, the works........  tToday - was magical and a dream of many, many, many years has come to fruition.  Obviously we don't own the whole darn thing, but we do have access to a piece of heaven in many different places.  Can't wait to share with the kids, grandkids, and sibs.  Michael LB - it has happened.... invites to family will be forthcoming.

What can I say besides WAHOOOOOOOOOOO!

Time to Write a Bit

It really has been awhile.  I think I write today because a lot has transpired over the last 24 hours.  It is early in the morning, 4:52AM to be precise - I'm experiencing a "gout" attack in my left ankle and foot - kind of a quick onset.  I think I'll have to study this dis ease a bit more so I can understand it better.

Carolyn will be off on a day of high adventure -- day heck, from 8:30 in the morning until 11:30 at night, that is quite an outing - a spiritual experience - good for her.

I on the other hand may be taking it easy today - the 70th birthday party was a really wonderful one (Carolyn's sister) . We had 55 guests at the house and a really wonderful time.  We celebrated Carolyn's 65th and Heather's 42 at the same time.

As for seasons, I'm ready for winter to be over.  I can't get the darn snow blower fixed - although I now know how to take it completely apart and put it back together again.  It is always fun learning new skills and buying things like "gear pullers", spark plugs, condensers, rope pulls - and then still not getting it to run correctly.  But I did meet the goal of having no "parts" , bolts, nuts, or thing-a-ma-bobs left over when all was doing.  Maybe I'll be luck and won't have to shovel any more 18" snows.  Wouldn't that be nice.

Life is good.... and so are the majority of my moments!  Enjoy yours too.

2012 - What will it bring?

Another New Year's day.  No partying for us last night - it's why some of my relatives ( no names) leave town for this celebration - well, because some of us just don't celebrate.  Carolyn and I watched a few episodes of "Tommy and Tuppence Partners in Crime" by Agatha Christie.  I think the series was one of the few where Agatha experimented with a lot of sexual innuendo in a very playful sort of way and with a lot of double meanings ( I wanted to use the word "entendre" but no clue how to spell it.

I thought it would be appropriate to add a picture - that's Berry Berry in the tree.  Mary Berry wasn't around the day this one was taken.  Anyhow, this is still when the tree had lots of berries for Berry.  As of today only a few are left so Berry and Mary will not to find a new food source.

We didn't (the guys and I) play any golf in December.  We had lots of snow so the courses were not clear.  But, we do have a tee time for January 3rd - it will be good to get out on the course again.

I've started this new year with no resolutions - what will be, will be.  Today I've already adjusted the automated light and fan in the bath and cleaned some 20?? cobwebs from the ceiling.  Carolyn pointed them out yesterday - I guess I missed em when I really thought I was doing a very thorough job of dusting on our last cleaning day.

I also MogPoged the puzzle we put together - one of Carolyn's Christmas gifts (from me) was a box of 10 various sized Fairy Lore puzzles.  Our first was a 300 piece puzzle - the largest is 1000 pieces... I know for some these are not a challenge - for us its plenty.  Folks can have a good conversation whilst making progress on a picture puzzle.

Today, being Sunday, we'll like do Starbucks then I'll watch the football game.  This season could be a surprise season for the Broncos.  We'll see.  the last few games have been interesting and fun (except for last week maybe).

I need to get to work on the annual Myrtle Beach trip.  I think we settled on the dates.  I got confirmation back from the rest of the gang of four.  It is now up to me to make the reservations and pick the courses we'll play - pressure.

Ah well, there is something to be said for living in the moment.  I don't think one worries much when they do - live in the moment that is.

Prayers for Aunt Joyce and Uncle Bob - I think Joyce is dad's last living sibling - Bob, her husband is clinging to life.  Carolyn and I saw them last when we were in California five or six years ago.

Last year was a big year for Carolyn and I - a new home, parties bigger than we've ever had in the past, lots of family visitors - it has been a joy to watch and experience Carolyn - I think she's having fun entertaining and I find I enjoy cooking breakfast for folks and cooking meats for the celebrations. Life is good!

Enjoy your moments this year - each and every one of them!

The Urge to Write or Berry!

It has been almost two months.  Two really exciting and interesting months so I last posted - why?  To tell you the truth I have not felt the urge during this time, nor have I been too busy to write.  But, today, for some reason, I just had to write something.

We've had a lot of "parties" since moving in - almost 4 and 1/2 months ago.  We've had family, Look Ahead friends, visitors and now a son and grand daughter are making their home here with us - for awhile.  It has been good.

Berry, well he's the squirrel that hangs out in our backyard.  Kyrie named him because he's eating all the berries off a tree.  That squirrel has practically cleaned the tree - it has been his own feasting ground - and it is almost totally harvested.  Berry looks healthy - if not a bit fat, hmmm.  Nah I couldn't do that.

It is probably about time that I posted some pictures again - maybe I'll post some of Berry -- if he turns out to be a lady squirrel I'll have to change that spelling to Berrie.  I might have to blow up the photos a bit.

Hey, how about them Broncos??????

Family Follow Up

Sure it has been a few days since the get together - which was awesome - We spent the bulk of the morning in the kitchen... and we had plenty of room for all.  It was nice to visit, cook, have some champagne, see the spouses and the brothers with the local sisters and such.  There was plenty for everyone - it was a very relaxed time.. a time for memories, dreams of the future, letting go and living.  I think the event brought home the purpose for moving to our new "home".

We had our first big snow yesterday - 6 or 7 inches of the white stuff.  The pine and fir trees look awesome -but, I'm ready for it all to go away - there's stuff to do outside yet and more golf to play.

This morning I'm sitting in the study listening to some very relaxing music.  This is a warm room and a very soft and relaxing atmosphere - maybe I'll fall asleep for a bit.  Carolyn, as usual, is already out and about.  I'm deciding whether to go to craft night or not.  It was okay last week, but not sure it is for me - just not sure.  for a bit, I thought I had the urge to paint again - it was, I think, a brief urge.

Life is about enjoying your moments - doing those things that bring one pleasure, enthusiasm, joy, happiness - I look across the room and notice something awry with the lamp on the piano -- needs fixing and being in the moment of discovery that is just what I'm going to do - some fixing!  Later.

Sister's Day (Martinez Clan)

Carolyn is hosting sister's lunch today.  We made it a sister/significant other brunch - complete with Mamosas and Bloody Mary's.  We've pushed ourselves the past few days to get our new home more like "our home"... it is fabulous, comfortable, simple -- furnished a lot quicker than I thought it would be - and for a lot less than I thought it would be.

We've had the kitchen counter lowered, the garage insulated, dry walled, and painted.  Its awesome.  Life is good and the world is treating as very well.  We helped Kindle move yesterday - what a gal.  Drew must know how fortunate he is to have her.

Megan seems to be doing real well also.... talked to her on the phone a bit - I gotta go do some work at old house.

Life is so full of new moments with so many new experiences.... ain't it great!!!!!!

Busy Bees

Yesterday - golf, planted 5 trees,  finished painting the guest room trim, assembled bed frame, continue to unpack and de-clutter.

Today - Jeff was here to lower the kitchen island - replaced a bad plank on the back of the house - painted same. Helped Jeremiah (well he and Debbie did most of it) move some of Kairi's furniture here temporarily, finished the casement window shelf in the guest room, drilled two holes in the concrete and mounted the closet door glider track.... scheduled the tee time for Monday - that was the most important thing I did.

Lots of very, very, very full moments.

Just Another Day

I look out my corner kitchen window.  One thing I miss about the old house is the view of the sunrise in the morning, always awesome.  Our new home doesn't really have an East or West view -- some South and North. So all I really get is a bit of the sky that spills over the two story homes behind us.  I do have my trees, the brook, the deck, the patio and so much more.  So, it really is "Just Another Day".

But, really, is this that - "Just Another Day".  I don't think so.  Each day has its special gifts for us - yesterday it was a mediocre round of golf but great friends - painting, watching the Broncos losing yet again - a wonderful spaghetti dinner and glass of Merlot.  All days are unique and special - they are given to us to enjoy to the fullest.  Sure we can grouse that everything isn't perfect - but, it is if you really think about it - perfect.

Just as each moment we have is perfect in its own way - and each of us is perfect as well.  The faults we me see or not see are there, but that doesn't make any difference -because all of this is part of our unique and individual beingness (I coined this word).  In being we are really allowed to be ourselves - it doesn't matter what others may see to our face or behind our back- we just need to allow ourselves to be ... ourselves.  My encouragement to you is that you enjoy who you are and accept yourself as the gift you are to each and everyone else - including me!

Please, enjoy your moments - I'll be enjoying mine!

What, Another Table

Unbelievable, but true.  One would think we are collecting tables!!!  Well, I do think Carolyn found ( at long last) the table she really wants for the kitchen - we are picking it up Friday.  The one we are currently using will head for the "sewing room"...  It will be a great hobby and sewing table.

Tired today for some odd reason... played golf again-- two man scramble this morning.  It was fun.  I think I hit some of the best drives I've ever hit, and one fantastic 3 Metal (as Johnny Miller would say).  For those that are non-golfers, it is usually a 3 metal these days instead of a 3 wood because the woods are made out of metal so they really aren't woods anymore - doesn't have the same ring though.  Tuesday morning I played at Common Grounds - it was the last round of the men's inter-club league for the year.  It was nice to play some different courses in the area.

I now need to get the boat cleaned up ... I've been meaning to do it for a few days now, but I've been lazy.. It is definitely time to do some fall fishing.

Well, enough for now.  Enjoy your moments - all of them!